October 06, 2005

I'd be crabby if I had the energy

The gray and rain have sapped my strength. Emotions swing back & forth like a tetherball in the wind, whipped around at the mercy of invisible fury. Last night I switched the bed to flannel sheets and slept under 2 down comforters. I awoke in early-morning darkness as my lungs tried to escape my body. Cough. Cough. Well, sleep has been chased away. I am cold. My office is cold. My fingers hurt and I have four and a half more hours of sitting here before I can leave.

I am already dreading winter - the darkness, the cold, the life-sucking tedium of it all. I am afraid of how high my heating bills will be.

This weekend is my mini-reunion with friends from college. I am wondering what I will say. I am wondering how much they will have changed, too. At the moment, my apprehension outweighs my excitement.

Boys are stressful this week. Left a message for TheBoy Tuesday night, but haven't had a response yet. And IM-chatted with DrumBoy a few times this week, which was interesting.

I am confused. I am weary. I want this to be easier.

Posted by rachel at October 6, 2005 01:10 PM

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